November Dick of the Month: Angus T. Jones

November’s Dick of the month comes awfully late in the month (hence my lateness in writing and posting it…that and [this]).  With labor strikes in the NFL referee’s corps recently and now the NHL strike and subsequent lockout it has brought attention to overpaid sports stars who only put in backbreaking labor for a few days out of the year and make over 3,600% more than the bottom half of the country.  Said sports stars are demanding more millions of dollars per year, of course.  It also brings to mind the billionaires who own the team and won’t cut the stars people actually go out to watch a few more dollars, or y’know…cut the cost of tickets, beer, and hotdogs for the folks who come to watch their teams.


But in all that, we also have to remember the actors and actresses of movies and television who do even less work.  Let’s look at one of them

Angus T. Jones makes between $250,000 and $300,000 per episode.  With a 26 episode run that equates to around 7 million dollars a year

Then he comes out saying the show is evil and wicked and that you shouldn’t watch it, because it goes against his religious values.

Not enough to actually quit and give up the $7 million a year he’s getting paid, of course.  Just enough to tell you not to watch it.  Here’s his actual statement:

If you watch Two and a Half Men, please stop watching Two and a Half Men. I’m on Two and a Half Men, and I don’t want to be on it. Please stop watching it, and filling your head with filth. People say it’s just entertainment. Do some research on the effects of television and your brain, and I promise you you’ll have a decision to make when it comes to television, especially with what you watch.”

The day after the video of him saying all that crap, and more, goes viral…he comes out a statement, most definitely written by his lawyers or agent or something.  Charlie Sheen also offered him a spot on his new show, but I think that might be a little too risqué for poor little Angus if he was offended by Two and a Half Men.

You’d be surprised what I would do for $7 million.

Actually…if you read this blog you probably would be more surprised by I wouldn’t do for $7 million dollars.

Either way, I would most certainly act in a mildly risqué sitcom for $7 million a year, that is assured.  And I certainly wouldn’t tell the audience, the people who ultimately ensure that my paycheck doesn’t bounce, to stop watching it and to basically stop watching television entirely.

So for being a horrible business person, alone, and risking a $7 million a year career when he’s already in an overpaid and overhyped profession, Angus T. Jones you are November’s Dick of the Month.


Seriously though, if you can come up with $7 million, I am pretty much yours to command.


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