Update: Some of you have already read this post, because WordPress and I derped out and this went live, but went to the back of the timeline. Here it is, in the proper sequence.
The wife and I were at work (we worked together the other day) and for lunch she had made us up some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. She made me two and then made herself one, which she put extra peanut butter and jelly on, because she likes really thick sandwiches.
I got hungry and went for the lunchbox, discovering that she had put all three sandwiches in the same Tupperware container. I grabbed one and started eating it.
Half way through the sandwich she decides to ask if I grabbed the correct one. I was like…
She checked the container and then went on a tirade, bitching about me having eaten her sandwich, because I grabbed the wrong one. She claimed that she put her sandwich into the container, backwards from how my two were and that I had grabbed hers by mistake.
She then took the remaining half of the sandwich and ate it. I continued to protest that I couldn’t tell her system and after about fifteen minutes of going back and forth she pulled the container back out and pointed to it saying, “See how both of the sandwiches are facing the same…wait a minute…”
She quickly shoved the container back in the lunch bag and muttered, “Oops.”
I had eaten the correct sandwich, which means that she had not only stolen my sandwich, but she had berated me for stealing hers for almost half an hour.
There was only one thing to do in recompense…I tickled her until she almost peed herself.
And I changed her display name in my phone’s contacts to Sandwich Thief.