Welcum two Stock Home, Njoy Yur Steh.

I’m sure we’ve all seen those silly posts on FaceBook, Reddit, Tumblr, Twitter, and wherever else people frequently go to poke fun at idiots. And you know exactly the kind of posts I’m talking about…

Re: Holocaust

Re: Holocaust

Stuff like this…

Re: Time Zones

Re: Time Zones

Or that…

Re: Genetics

Re: Genetics

and especially that.

I wonder if you’re all like me. You laugh, you hate the world for existing for a moment, and then you chalk it up to somebody trolling or just being silly because surely no one is really that stupid.

Re: Mediocre

Re: Mediocre

But then you see it…in real life. That friend’s e-mail that tells you how to make nifty blue glow sticks when in reality they’re making a deadly chlorine bomb, your grandma warning about people hiding out under cars and cutting your ankles off with a machete when you’re in a parking garage, or that co-worker who tells you they’re going to How Why E on vacation. Either way they bring into question the person’s gullibility and make you question the whole country’s education system.

Re: The reason why Tigers eat their young.

Re: The reason why Tigers eat their young.

That’s right folks, nobody is immune: Sometimes those people really do exist. You know them by name, you live with them, you work alongside them. Hell they may even get paid more than you!

That is my personal case, a young lady was hired at the place I work as a part-timer a few months ago and during a department restructuring she got bumped up to full-time employment. Now she’s a nice enough girl, but she gets paid 25 cents an hour more than me. She’s a regular working in her department, while I am the department manager for my own department. That’s infuriating enough, but it doesn’t help that our departments overlap a lot. She does some of the same work I do…of course like I said, she gets paid more than me to do it. She also gets 3 dollars an hour more than the regular workers in my department…to do half the same work as we do.

She does half of what we do, then goes back and files papers and helps sort the mail for the rest of the day. Hell, I’ll sort mail for a 25 cent raise, if that means I can stop worrying about scheduling, payroll, managing patrols, incident reports, safety seminars, fighting off Professor Moriarty with a blunt stick, fixing the access mainframe, putting out the kitchenette fires when people forget to turn off empty coffee pots in the break rooms, and chasing away homeless people who try to sleep in our parking garage.

Mail sorting sounds pretty nice, now doesn’t it?

But of course, there’s always an explanation for stuff like that, right? Maybe she has me solidly outdone in education. Maybe she has a Master’s Degree in mail sorting, compared to my 4th grade education in geography? Of course, my geography knowledge definitely makes me look smart in e-mails.

You see, while she was doing some of the same work as me and my crew, she received a message to be forwarded to someone else. This is the message she forwarded (minus identifiable information)…

Re: Stockholm, Sweden

Re: Reel Educashun

She is of course talking about Stock Home, Sweden.

Also known as: Stockholm, Sweden.

Also known as: Stockholm.

Maybe she was just in a difficult relationship and has been affected by Stock Home Syndrome, right?

BTW, in case you didn’t want to do the math…that’s a pay difference in her favor of over $500 a year. Maybe I should move to Sore Ache, Switzerland or See Owl, South Korea, maybe Bay Shing, China…ooo, I’ll bet there’s plenty of good jobs in Pray Tore A, South Africa.

~RCS

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Free lessons in Dickjutsu by e-maill. Or if you don't get the joke, it's the subscription button.

%d bloggers like this: