DJ Comic: Easter

I guess the Easter Bunny is a real dick to you when you don’t celebrate its holiday.

Ͼ-Mimi

DJ Comic: February Holidays Part 3

NEVER MESS WITH SOMEONE’S YAOI!  It’s just not polite.

Yeah, right now I’d much rather have rain than snow.  I can’t wait for spring!

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN THAT’S NOT HOW YOU MAKE FRIENDS?  Although if that is case, that would explain why I don’t have many friends.

Ͼ-Mimi

DJ Comic: February Holidays Part 1

Even if Rich and I ever do have a “legit” wedding ceremony it would definitely not happen in February.  Even with an inside wedding you still have to deal with traveling to wherever the wedding is in shitty weather.  Well at least where Rich and I live.  But I assume most people probably want a February wedding because of Valentine’s Day, which I find to be kinda silly, but hey whatever floats your goat.

Of course with how February weather is going right now it might not actually be too bad.  The past few days have felt more like a mild autumn day than winter.

Ͼ-Mimi

DJ Comic: January Holidays Part 4

Yep, nothing rains harder on a parade than editing.

IS THERE ANYONE OR ANYTHING THAT DOESN’T THINK I’M WEIRD OR STRANGE?!

It’s a lot easier to teach someone if you pay attention to them, Senpai.

Ͼ-Mimi

DJ Comic: January Holidays Part 3

I can barely remember my own address, let alone other people’s addresses!

Ha, that houseplant gives me way too much credit, I’m weird pretty much all the time.

This is one of the reasons why Rich and I don’t own pets, nothing would get done.

Ͼ-Mimi

DJ Comic: September Holidays Part 2

“A Desperate Mother’s Love” is the game Rich and I made for the IGMC this year.  If you haven’t checked it out yet, you really should!  It’s free to download and play.

Yeah, cause none of the other comics are ever late, riiiight….

See, that’s why I’m always late!  I’m terrible at fighting procrastination!  It kicks my ass every time!

I don’t know how the weather is for everyone else right now, but man, the last day of summer thing is no joke.  Since Tuesday the 8th it’s been pretty cold.

Ͼ-Mimi

DJ Comic: August Holidays Part 1

Okaaaaay, after a long month of game making… and almost having a heart attack (thanks Norton for making me think it deleted Comipo completely!) back to the comic!

That’s actually how it usually goes a lot now.  I can still ride a lot of amusement park rides and such that Rich (and a lot of other people apparently) can’t.  Which makes going to the amusement park kinda hard sometimes.

Ͼ-Mimi

DJ Comic: May Holidays Part 2

Sooo… apparently these don’t upload themselves.  Imagine that!  Sorry for the late post.  Forgot to schedule it; my bad.

Ͼ-Mimi

War on Christmas!

This Christmas the folks at Fox News have been at it, as if they ever aren’t at it.  What are they at?

That’s right!  Atheists, Agnostics, Muslims, Jews, and Pastafarians beware, Fox News is on to your schemes.

Thanks to extremist action like dubbing seasonally decorated pine trees ‘Holiday Trees’, or erecting a Festivus pole (that sounds a lot dirtier when you read it out of context), to saying “Happy Holidays” at a store instead of “Merry Christmas”.

For those of who are new to the site (welcome newbies!) you might not be aware that I’m not a particularly religious fellow.  You might also be unaware that I am vehemently against the way Republicans have been steadily transforming the nation I once loved into a theocracy, and the way Democrats have just rolled right along with them.

If you’re not new around here, you know my political views are best summarized in this quote by me (you also know I find it slightly abhorrent to quote oneself, so shush!): “The only thing worse than a Republican is a Democrat.  A Republican walks out and says, ‘You’re not a religiously Christian, white, straight, wealthy man?  Well I’m about to screw you over.’  Then he does as promised.  A Democrat walks out and says, ‘You’re not a wealthy, white, religiously Christian, straight man?  Well I’m totally gonna fight for you.’  Then the Democrat does the same thing the Republican did.”

Republicans are all about screwing over the majority of the country; the Democrats are all about hypocrisy.  Welcome to America, folks.

But I have to say that the War on Christmas discussion does bring up valid points, at a ratio of about 1 to 100,000.  Now each of these valid points does have a caveat I must mention.  So here’s my list of Top 5 Valid Points Made by the War on Christmas Idiots.

Hrmm…that’s kind of a very prejudiced title.  Maybe this instead…

Top 5 Valid Points Made by the War on Christmas Argument

Eh, what the hell, works for me.

Point Number 1!

If you’re not Christian and somebody wishes you a Merry Christmas, get off your high horse and just say thank you.  I’m a night owl, I don’t often wake up before the sun rises; more often than not I go to bed as it’s rising (I work evening shifts).  But if someone tells me, ‘Have a Good Day!’ I don’t snap at them say, “I live during the night, I don’t celebrate days!”

So just shut the fuck up and thank them for at least giving a shit about your existence during their holiday season.

Caveat: The first amendment says that the Government will not pick one religion over another.  Therefore we should not have any religious holidays officially recognized by the government.  Christmas should not be a federal holiday.  Now if you want to make a federal holiday in December and call it Winter Holiday, or Solstice Day, or something like that, perfectly fine.  And if a store wants to have a big sale during the Solstice Day season and call it a Christmas Sale, that’s fantastic it’s a private organization, go for it.  Hell stores have Christmas in July sales why not Christmas in December sales, too?  Sure, I’m all for it.  But if the government calls it Christmas, I better get my mail delivered that day.  The Post Office should be open on Easter (well, Good Friday, no mail on Sundays anyway), Christmas, and any other religious holiday.  Thanksgiving I’m okay with, because it just has a semi-religious name.  The actual holiday celebrates a time when a bunch of pioneers got together with the poor bastards they were about to conquer to share food and shelter and give thanks to their chosen deities for being the few survivors to live through the diseases, attacks, cold, and starvation that had killed off so many of their friends, relatives, and neighbors.

Point Number 2!

If you put up a tree…it’s a fucking Christmas Tree!  Don’t call it a Holiday Tree you hypocritical idiot!  If you’re decorating a pine tree with garland and calling it a Holiday Tree because you came from a religious background and you’re just following family tradition, even though you’re Agnostic…you’re an idiot; you’re decorating a Denial Tree is what you’re doing.

Now if you’re calling your garland and ornament covered tree a Holiday Tree because you’re fanatically Christian and you believe that a tree and an old man in a red suit have nothing to do with Christ’s birth, then have at, you are the 1% of Holiday Tree-ers who have a valid excuse!

We don’t put up Menorahs and call them Holiday Candles, we don’t create an Eidgah for Eid-al-Adha and call it Holiday Prayer Field, so why do we put Christmas Trees up and call them Holiday Trees?

It’s stupid is what it is.

Caveat: No government entity should ever, ever erect either a Christmas Tree or a Holiday Tree in the U.S.  I loathe and detest the White House Christmas Tree, because my tax dollars are spent on putting up a religious symbol.  If the President wants to put up a Christmas Tree with his own money, then have at, Hoss.  But stop using my tax dollars to fund your religious celebrations!

One of my coworkers, a Christian, argued that it was a very small amount of money from the nation’s tax income that went to the tree and the celebrations around it.

I presented this scenario: We elect a Jewish president and he uses your tax dollars to put up a 40-foot tall Menorah.  Now how do you feel?

How about this one, we elect a legit Muslim president (Obama doesn’t count, because he’s a fucking Protestant!!) and he puts a giant Crescent Moon, fifty feet tall, in the White House Greens.

What if we elect a President who follows the Norse traditions and he slaughters an ox on the White House lawn?  Your tax dollars funded that ox, that knife, and the whole pagan practice.

That kind of shut him up and he nodded and said, “Okay I see your point.”

So stop using my non-Christian tax money to fund your Christmas Trees, Obama!

Obama, I am disappoint.

Point Number 3!

I heard on Fox News (because it’s the only channel they let us watch in the Lobby now! GAHHH!!  Just condemn me to hell already, it can’t be worse than this!) that Festivus Poles are going up in governmental areas.  This is because governmental organizations like state senates and community councils got tired of getting sued by the ACLU and Atheist organizations for using our tax dollars to put up nativity scenes; or even just allowing nativity scenes on government property.

So now they either have to allow just about anything or allow nothing.  Personally I’m in favor of the latter, but I guess including everyone works, too.

So a Festivus Pole is basically, in most of these cases, a long stack of beer cans (Pabst Blue Ribbon seems to be the norm) to celebrate the holiday invented by George Costanza’s father on the show Seinfield.  “Festivus for the Rest of Us!”

I find this hilarious, but Christian fanatics are pissed because Festivus is a made up holiday.  Which is true, Festivus was invented in the 1990s as a joke for a sitcom.

Caveat: Aaand…Christmas was a holiday created by the Roman Empire to validate still celebrating Saturnalia, a date in late December where they celebrated Sol Invictus the “Birth of the Unconquerable Sun” that is celebrated by role reversal among wealthy classes and slaves, the giving of gifts, and maybe even some gay orgies.

Just like how Hanukkah is also an invented holiday, invented by a bunch of Jews who wanted to celebrate an even that occurred during the Maccabean Revolt.  Just like how Memorial Day is an invented holiday to commemorate soldiers who died in the service of the country, invented by American citizens to honor their war dead (actually it was originally invented by the British as Armistice Day, if I recall my holiday history).

All holidays are made up.  The bible never once mentions any of the holidays being ordained by God that, on a particular day you will stop working and hang out with friends, family, and people you can’t stand to see more than once or twice year (usually defined as relatives).

Point Number 4!

…oh shit, really?  I only came up with 3 points for my list?

Uhh, okay, don’t…now don’t panic.  Take this little mini-photopost to make up for it!

~RCS

Enjoy your holidays, all of them…Christmas, Eid-al-Adha, Bodhi Day, etc.

Labor Pains

Somehow I managed to get Labor Day off this year (that’s a rarity in my industry, on account of how criminals don’t generally take the holidays off).  I just want you all to know that I am still alive, I have just been incredibly busy, hence why the Otakon review is not up, yet.  I’m still writing it.  I hope to catch up a bit on this here Labor Day, but catching up is such a pain…

That whole line was just to set up this joke.

As soon as I can actually get some time to do things besides fixing our new house (Living Room, Dining Room, Closet, and Kitchen are done…only have to do the office, bedroom, basement, attic, and the entire freakin’ outside!!) I hope to get caught up on the DotM posts, get the Otakon review up, and at least preview, if not outright release, our new feature (secret-y stuff, shh!).

In the meantime here’s a short photopost about Labor Day.

Le Gasp!!

~RC–

Wait, what?  I told you it was a short photopost.  Not good enough?  Okay…how about a Labor Day rant, since I haven’t gone all political on your asses in a while.

Labor Day is a celebration of the hard-working masses who propel this country toward prosperity, no matter how many bankers, board members, politicians, lawyers, and other classification of criminals work against them.  So why is it that the lowest-tiered jobs are actually the ones who don’t get the day off?  Look around, travel a bit, and you’ll find a (less-than-) dedicated crew of low-class workers.  For instance take a look at the common grocery store today.  While you’re away on a Labor Day vacation the Janitors, Security Guards, Cashiers, Stockers, and food preparers are still working.  In the average office building you’ll see much the same, guards and janitors sitting around BSing because there’s not much to do since nobody else showed up to do any real work.

But who always gets the day off?  Bankers, politicians, lawyers, and board members…the same kinds of people who cause all the problems and treat the low-class workers like shit the whole rest of the year.  The one day dedicated to the common worker…and these assholes make the common worker work like a common day, then take a Monday off to get drunk and bitch about how they only made $2 million in bonuses last year, instead of the normal $4 million.

Reminds me of when I got out of the service, moved a hundred miles out of the jobless countryside I was born in, and got a job in a factory just outside of Pittsburgh.  Let me remind you that the President of the Company used the company’s accounts to finance his house, his car, his wife’s car, his daughter’s car, and they fired a salesman so that they could give the company car to his younger daughter (who was only 15 at the time).  We had a crew of 13 guys working in 100 degree weather inside an old building that was poorly maintained, had poor ventilation, improper storage areas for dangerous/explosive/corrosive/deadly chemicals, and no air conditioning.  There were four AC units in the whole building…1 in the President’s office, 1 in the President’s secretary’s office (his aforementioned wife, of course), one in the Accountant’s office, and one in the back of the Plant Manager’s office that actually did more to cool the hallways between the offices of the President, Secretary, and Accountant than cool the PM’s office (where we would sit to get new orders).

So there we are, 13 guys all getting paid $22,000 a year, each.  The President came into the Plant Manager’s office and whined that he had to cut his own pay down to $125,000 a year.  Yes, he paid himself $100,000+ more than each of his regular employees, every year…and that was after cutting his own pay.  Keep in mind he wasn’t some genius entrepreneur or something…his father-in-law founded the company fifty years ago and this guy married the eldest daughter and jointly inherited 51% stock in the company through the marriage.  He wanted the PM to put more pressure on us to start working off the clock to get more things done; yeah, he wanted the 22 grand a year workers to work off-the-clock so he could raise his own pay back up to normal.  Keep in mind the guy was there twice a week, and the rest of the week he was coaching the local school’s softball team, playing golf, running for school board, or just sitting around at home watching the gardeners mow his lawn.

On Labor Day he should be working the floor while the regular workers are at home celebrating, certainly not the other way around.

~RCS

Okay, one more funny one…