Obama Has Gone Too Far!

That’s it, he’s just gone way too far this time!  I am finally ready to fully embrace Republicanism (uhh, again, I guess since I voted for McCain =/ ), because this time Obama has just taken it a step too far.  Obamacare was bad enough, but now he’s actually gone and staked a claim on an American Monarchy.

That’s right, Obama has declared himself a Monarch!  That’s right, he has declared himself…


…Princess Obama!

Haha, isn’t it cute?


Now if only his policies didn’t suck.

October Dick of the Month: Paul Ryan

I try to keep politics out of the Dick of the Month.  I’ve talked about Rush Limbaugh before, but that was because he’s personally a dick, I don’t care about his dickish politics.  But alas, sometimes you do something so outrightly dickish in the name of politics, that we have to feature you anyway.  Such as Jeremy Faison’s idiotic rant in favor of bullying on the Tennessee state congressional floor.

And that is where our future Vice-President Paul Ryan (please let me be wrong!!) comes into the story.  You see he and his crony Mitt Romney are trying to get elected by, well…by us, actually.

Unfortunately for Paul Ryan he had a habit in his younger days of talking about hero, Ayn Rand.  Now the Ayn Randian philosophy, called Objectivism, is that charity is a bad thing and that the only way to further society is to promote self-interest, selfishness, and unmitigated free enterprise.

In case you want an idea of how that might work, play the game Bioshock, because the hellish underwater dystopia of Rapture is based on the ideology of Ayn Rand’s Objectivism.

I’ve seen on the news an expert on Objectivism talk about how Ayn Rand would not have liked Mitt Romney, because of how much he donates to charity and to the Mormon Church, especially, since the Mormon Church uses that money to fund its own charitable activities.

But Paul Ryan certainly would have made Ayn Rand proud this time.  You see, he was trying to distance himself from his Objectivist roots to make himself look better for the camera to the poor populace who he needs to vote for him and Romney.

Ryan got some pictures taken inside a Soup Kitchen, washing some dishes in a suit and tie…and an apron.  The problem is…this was apparently after the lunch-time meal was served around noon, when the Soup Kitchen wasn’t even open.  The dishes were already clean and he just sprayed water on them.

He also lied to the person in charge and claimed that they had permission to film in there.  They didn’t.  Paul Ryan got his pictures, washing the clean dishes, and left.  The pictures went viral, as was intended, and the owner of the Soup Kitchen was pissed about it.

You see, the St. Vincent De Paul Society Soup Kitchen runs on donations from private institutions such as wealthy donors and organizations.  As the society president states:

“We’re a faith-based organization; we are apolitical because the majority of our funding is from private donations.  It’s strictly in our bylaws not to do it. They showed up there, and they did not have permission.”

First off, we have Ryan’s own comments that would make Ayn Rand very sad, “This is what makes society go. It makes it work.  Helping people.”

Secondly, we have the damage he’s done to the institution that would probably even make Ayn Rand blush.

You see, because of letting the Republican VP nominee into the soup kitchen, the St. Vincent De Paul Society lost a number of their Democrat donors.  Then, for coming out and saying that Paul Ryan used his position and influence to lie his way through the doors and that he wasn’t allowed in there after all, the St. Vincent De Paul Society lost a number of their Republican donors.

So, for cleaning a few spotless pans so hard that you managed to put a Soup Kitchen, feeding the poor and homeless, out of business…you, Congressman Paul Ryan are the October Dick of the Month.


Electoral College…You’re Fired! Pt. 2

So, last time I spoke about the Electoral College.  Today I’ll say how I think it should work.

I think each state should have equal footing.  We don’t adjust a state’s importance based on how many people live in it…we don’t have 50 differently sized stars on the flag, we are a union of 50 states all of equal rank and stature.  Except in the House of Representatives (which should be gotten rid of) and the Electoral College (also needs rid of).

California has 55 votes, Texas has 38, and Alaska has 3.  Bullshit, they’re all states, they’re all equally liable to be given federal funds, and they all deserve equal representation.  We don’t have 310 million stars on the flag; we have 50.

The government should work like this…


The federal government decides the fate of the nation as a whole, all 50 states.  Each state decides the fate of it’s respective counties, however many.  Each county decides the fates of its assorted boroughs and cities.  And each borough or city determines the fates of its respective households, i.e. the people themselves.

Counties shouldn’t decide the presidential election and the federal government shouldn’t decide your local property taxes.

So here is how I think the Electoral College should work.  Each state has 10 electoral votes, regardless of size, population, or anything else.  You need to win 256 electoral votes to win the elections.  Why 256?  Because that’s 50+% of the 510 possible votes.

510?!  Yes…Washington DC currently has 3 electoral votes, so it will be raised to 10 like all the other states.  D.C. doesn’t count as its own state, but it does have sway in the election specifically because it does not answer to any specific state.

Why 10 votes?  Because the electoral votes will be based on the popular vote, we’ll get rid of electors entirely.  Now you will get 1 vote for each 10% of the popular vote you get in a state.  So if you only get 17% of the popular vote, instead of winning the presidency…you’ll only have 86 electoral votes.  If you have 78% of the popular vote you will win the presidency with 397 electoral votes.

Much better, right?


Electoral College…You’re Fired! Pt. 1

It’s probably no secret that I’m not a big fan of the Electoral College.  I’m also not a big fan of the House of Representatives, Islamaphobia, Homophobia, over taxation of the poor, or Paris Hilton.

But with the election right around the corner, I’m going to talk about the Electoral College, today.  You all know what the Electoral College is, right?  It’s the thing that makes your vote for President meaningless.  Remember how Al Gore won the election, but G.W. Bush became president?  Well that’s because Al Gore didn’t win the electoral vote.  And before you conservative schmucks claim I’m just a crazy, liberal democrat…I supported Bush against Gore, because I can’t stand Al Gore.  I’m glad Al Gore wasn’t president, but he should have been is my point.  Even a blind pig finds and acorn and even a corrupt bourgeoisie organization like the Electoral College can get it right once in a while.

Now here’s how it works in a simplified form…

The Electoral College decides who becomes president with each state having a different amount of electoral votes, based on their population.  The first person to reach 270 electoral votes wins the presidency.

Now theoretically that means you need to have the support of over 50% of the country to become president of the United States.  But that’s not true…

For instance, if you were to get over 50% of the support of just 11 states, which equal out to just 20% of the total population of the nation…you still win the presidency.  Let’s look at the situation…

The following will occur if you win the following 11 states: California, Texas, Florida, Georgia, North Carolina, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Michigan, Illinois, New York, and New Jersey.

You will have 270 votes spread across the 11 states.

Your opponent will have only 268 votes spread across the remaining 39 states.

So if you lose 78% of the states, but you’re still president over all 50 states; just because of the way the Electoral College is set up.  If you win the majority of a state, which you can do with less than 50% of the electoral vote if there are more than 2 candidates, you get all of the electoral votes.  I think there may be exceptions in Nebraska and Maine, where the electoral votes are split, but nonetheless for the majority it is winner-take-all.

Now, admittedly the likelihood of this particular scenario playing out is highly unlikely.  California has been democrat since 1992, Texas has been Republican since 1980, Georgia has been Republican since 1996, and Illinois has been Democrat since 1992.

But, it’s not impossible.

So let’s assume you get the most votes of these 11 states in a 3 person election, you could conceivably get only get 35% of each state and you get all 270 votes with only what would be the equivalent of like 17% of the population actually supporting you.

Sounds like a really foolproof system, huh?  Yeah, didn’t think so.

Here’s a map to show you what I’m talking about.

My next post will speak of how I think it could be fixed.


Living Off a Million Dollars

I talk off and on about the capability to live off a million dollars, which a lot of people tell me I am wrong about.  I like to respond that…I am not.  Without delving too deeply into my income I make between 20-25 thousand dollars a year, myself; depending on how much overtime I work.

Now if I switched to only working two days a week at my current job and rate, I would make about $8,000 a year.

So let’s look at what would happen if I went from working 40+ hours a week to working 16 hours a week, but had a million dollars in the bank.

I could place my million dollars into a 5-year CD (Certificate of Deposit) with my credit union which would bring an interest rate of 1.88% interest per year (the last time I bought a CD it had 3.30% interest; damn economy).  I could live off the dividends, which would equal out to $18,963.  So a million dollars only pays a thousand dollars or so less than I make working 5 days a week, every week, with no time off: Working 2,080 hours a year.

Keep in mind that million dollars’ interest would be $18,963 for 0 hours of work a year.  If I work 2 days a week and take no additional time off, that’s only 832 hours a year of work and I’d make a grand total of $26,963.

Amazing what a million dollars can do for you in a 5-year rolling CD.

Elin Nordegren, whom I recently spoke of buying a $12 million mansion and razing it, got $100 million from her divorce settlement.  So let’s take a look at what kind of money you could make, doing 0 hours of income-bearing work, and putting the entire $100 million in the same 5-year rolling CD I was just speaking of.

You’d make…$1.9 million a year in interest.  That’s right.  And you’d pay a lower tax rate on it than you did if you actually earned that money.

Let’s say that Nordegren builds an $18 million mansion where the $12 million one stood.  That will leave her with $70 million to put in the bank.  She would make…$1.3 million a year in interest.

And look at Republican Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney, who makes about $20,000 every 8 hours.  That’s equivalent to making $2,500 an hour if he worked 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year; that’s a grand total of $21.9 million a year in income.

And both Romney and my million-dollar CD only pay 15% taxes, whereas I pay closer 22% tax on the money I bust my ass for.  In other words, he pays a little less than $3.3 million a year in taxes.  If he paid the same 22% that I do on my hard-earned money, that’d be a little more than $4.8 million.  Whereas I pay a little more than $4,600 in taxes, but if I only paid 15% in taxes, I’d pay a little more than $3,100.

I’d love to have a million dollars or so, I’d never have to work again in my life if I didn’t want to.  Warren Buffett might be issuing challenges about donating money to the government in taxes; but I’ll challenge any wealthy person to disprove me by giving me a million dollars to try my theory out with.

If I can’t live as comfortably as I am now with just the interest from the million dollars they pony up, I’ll give the million dollars back.  If an independent source can vouch that my quality of life is on-par, or better, with me living just off the interest dividends then I get to keep the million.

I guarantee not a single millionaire/billionaire will take up my offer.


Elected Stock

I thought of an interesting piece of legislature for elected officials that will help cut down on some lobbying and biased views.  Elected officials within the Senate, House of Representatives, and President’s office (including the Presidential Cabinet) will only be allowed to acquire income through their office’s salaries.

So if the President is paid $250k a year, that is all he can get for his 4-8 years in office.  If he owns a tenement building, he can’t claim any of the income from that building.  Any property he owns that produces income must be automatically given to a registered charitable organization, sans any applicable property taxes.  This is not tax deductible donations, either; this money never sees his tax returns as a donation.

Elected officials in the higher offices must also own no stock when they take office.  So the president is elected into office in November…he has until he takes office in January to liquidate his stocks so that he does not own any shares of any private companies.

Likewise an elected official’s immediate family must own no stock or have their own income, as well; that is children under 18 and spouses.  So the elected official and his immediate family are not weighed down by biased decisions that will benefit or detract their fortunes.

Of course, I also support getting rid of the House of Representatives and cloistering the Senate; so we already know that I don’t really like how Congress is working, huh?


Good News From Iowa

In case you aren’t aware, the Iowa Caucus had brought the country a lot of good news.  Michelle Bachman has dropped out of the race.  I don’t like Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, or Rick Perry…well, let me rephrase that.  I don’t like Rick Perry’s political views or his religious views, but I have to admit that he seems like a nice guy to hang out with.  In other words…Rick Perry is the new George Dubya Bush: Bad politics and beliefs, but good guy, personally.  Mitt Romney would be a nice guy to hang out, like at the billionaire country club or private ski resort or something.  And I legitimately don’t like Newt Gingrich, as a person; he’s a scoundrel who should have been knifed by his first wife.

Anyway, politically I don’t agree with Romney, Gingrich, or Perry.  Honestly I don’t agree 100% with Ron Paul, either.  But Michelle Bachman was legitimately dangerous to the nation.  I know that she, and others, called Ron Paul dangerous…but all he may have done was bring us into a war with Iran.

I said a couple weeks ago that I like Ron Paul because he walks out, looks you in the eye, and admits he’s bat-shit crazy.  I don’t care that he’s bat-shit crazy enough to get rid of income taxes, or ignore Iran’s nuclear program, or pull troops out of South Korea.  He knows it sounds bat-shit crazy and that’s the angle he’s going for.

But Michelle Bachman was one-hundred times more dangerous because she was twice as bat-shit crazy as Ron Paul and what’s worse…she didn’t know it!  She thought she made sense and her own little universe, she did.

Incriminating conversations that never happened were real, in her head.  She told CNN newscasters, on numerous occasions, that polls didn’t matter; especially not the latest most-accurate poll.  Then in the next sentence she’d say that she was destined to win, because a poll from 4 months earlier had her in first place; even though it was the last time she was in first place.

She was deranged and a raving lunatic, quite frankly, and I am glad that she got out of the race.  My only fear now is that Mitt Romney will win the nomination and bring Bachman in as V.P. to get the votes of the Women, Evangelicals, and Tea Partiers.  It’s a sensible strategy…if you ignore the fact that Michelle Bachman is nuclear-strength bat-shit fanatically deranged.

At least Sarah Palin was harmlessly ignorant.  Bachman is dangerously ignorant.  I’m a little afraid that she’s actually on the Congressional National Defense Committee; to be honest.

But the good news is that she’s out of the race, at least for now.  So we can rest for a moment and prepare for Romney to make a bad decision when he, unfortunately and inevitably, wins the nomination.

Now one quick thing about the Iowa runner-up Rick Santorum: As a fellow Pennsylvanian I know first-hand how terrible he’d do as the President.  Here’s hoping that he’ll fall flat within the next few months.  I’d rather see his archnemesis, Dan Savage, win the Presidency.


Ron Paul For…Real?

Sorry for the late-night update, instead of my usual morning updates.  I figured I’d give you folks something now, rather than tomorrow morning.

With the rising of Ron Paul’s poll numbers I feel it time to speak about Ron Paul.  But first let me talk about my feelings on the GOP candidates as a whole: I never liked Mitt Romney, Rick Perry, Newt Gingrich, or Michelle Bachman; at least not as a Presidential candidate.  I have to admit that Mitt Romney and Rick Perry seem like great guys to hang out with, especially Perry, but I don’t like them to run my country.

I did like Herman Cain because he was trying to do something different; I’m not sure if it would have worked, but it was something different.  And different is what we need.

Now before I go too much further, let me add that I voted for John McCain in the last election.  If for no other reason than because I wanted him for the past two elections and they kept giving me Dubya.  And yes, I supported Dubya…mostly because I couldn’t stand his competition.  Gore was a hypocritical profiteer and Kerry was a horse-faced liar who couldn’t even keep his lies about his service in Vietnam straight.

That being said I would have voted for the Republican even if they hadn’t finally run McCain, because I never liked Obama.  If they had run Hillary, instead…now we’re considering possibilities.  I liked Clinton, he may have been a philanderer but he was a pretty good president.

I often agree with pivotal Democrat policies and ideologies, but I generally favor Republican candidates for President.  I like to refer to myself as somewhere in the glorious, sensible Middle.

Now with all that out of the way, let’s finally talk about Ron Paul.  I like Ron Paul…I liked him last time, I liked him the time before…I’ve liked him ever since I saw him on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno a few elections back.

Why do I like Ron Paul?

We’ve had a lot of bat-shit crazy candidates, a few bat-shit crazy presidents, too.  But they all come out saying, “Look; I’m sane, I’m sensible, I’m going to do things in a progressive, but moderated manner.  Vote for me.”

Not Ron Paul, no sir!  Ron Paul walks out, shakes your hand, says, “Hi, I’m Ron Paul and I’m bat shit crazy.  Vote for me.”

And I like that.  Even if I don’t agree with Ron Paul’s views, I just like the honesty of his approach.  He doesn’t flip-flop for votes, he’s a steady constant bat shit crazy; he doesn’t pander, he just tells you what his bat shit crazy ideas are and how they will benefit you; and he doesn’t wag about like he’s entitled to the presidency, he just asks you to exercise your right to put his crazy ass in the Oval Office.

Add in the fact that I like a lot of his ideas, and I’d argue you have my chosen candidate.

How crazy is he…?

Long before Rick Perry or Herman Cain made a big deal about Flat Taxes, Ron Paul was talking about them.  Over a decade ago, I’d reckon.  So he’s progressive, right?  But what makes that idea so crazy?  Simple.  Herman Cain wanted a 9% flat tax rate (plus 9% Sales tax, so closer 18%), Rick Perry wanted 20%, but Ron Paul wants 0% income tax.

Now I’m not going to lie…that benefits a rich person more than me.  Because he pays 17% tax on a million dollars of income (I wish I could get those millionaire deductions!) and I pay 15% on about 30 thousand dollars of income between my fiancé and me.

Sure he saves $173,000 in taxes and I only save $4,500.  But you know what?  I could really use that extra $4,500 a year.  If I made a million dollars, I wouldn’t care much about one or two hundred thousand!

If we can believe the Republicans that the wealthy create jobs when they have excess money, then the millionaire can hire 5 of my wife and I each year with what he’ll save.  And my wife and I can finally buy ourselves a house to help with the flaccid housing market.

So I’m voting for Ron Paul, even if he doesn’t get the nomination.  I’ll vote write-in if I have to.  I’m not so naïve to believe he could actually accomplish this, because Congress would never allow it…but I’d like to see someone try.  Someone who’s not going to give all my taxes to banks and businesses that are just going to turn around and overcharge me with fees or raised prices.


Edit: For honesty’s sake I edited this post…somewhere along the lines I made a typo and used a 2 instead of a 1, which fudged all my numbers after that point.  I have since fixed that issue.

No Longer The *Silent* Majority!

I was recently watching CNN news at work (the only channel the lobby gets) and they had a segment on the three American students who were arrested during the protests in Egypt’s Tahrir Square.  When they spoke about the Egyptian protestors as a whole they referred to the people staying at home and offering moral support to the cause as, “The silent majority”.

That made me start thinking of the Occupy Movement here in the U.S.  We have a few thousand people in every major city in the country camping out and protesting, getting beaten and shot at by police who are trying to maintain the peace.  Hundreds of people are getting arrested for merely using their First Amendment rights.

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

Then we have Barack Obama stand up and talk about how cruel the Arab nations are for shooting innocent civilians in Syria.  You know…innocent civilians who were wielding assault rifles, Molotov cocktails, and stolen artillery against the Syrian army.

Talk about hypocritical!

You know what we need here in America; the nation of the quiet majority and the loudmouthed minority?  We need a loud majority to tell the wealthy, powerful minority that they don’t control the country anymore.

Congress has failed, the president has failed, and the constitution has failed.  To give an example of the constitution’s failure, let’s look at the text I just quoted above:

Congress shall make no law…” It doesn’t say that the government can’t force you to shut up, can’t shut down your newspaper or radio/television station, can’t ignore your petition, can’t stop you from peacefully assembling.  It says they can’t make a law stating you can’t.

The police are not Congress, the Mayor is not congress, the President is not congress.  The police can mace you for assembling, that’s not a violation of the first amendment.  The Mayor can order the police to fire upon unarmed civilians, that’s not a violation of the first amendment.  The President can create an executive order stating that no more than fifty people can be in any public park at any time between the hours of noon and 4 am; that’s still not a violation of the first amendment.  Hell the President can declare Islam an illegal religion, via Executive Order, and not be violating the constitution’s goofy wording of the first amendment.  Round up all the Muslims, they’re gettin’ life sentences; it’s the American Inquisition!  Ooo, you know what else he could do?  He declare Judaism illegal, too.  We could round them up and put them in special Jew prison camps where we force them to do manual labor, until they get too sick or old, then we can–

No, wait…I think somebody already tried that.  I’m sure it didn’t work, right?

Buchenwald; Nazi Concentration Camp

That’s all true…and it’s all bullshit.  Bullshit in that it shouldn’t be true, but plainly is.  Don’t belive me?  We’ve done it before, about the same time as those other guys in Europe.

California, USA

Welcome to California, circa 1942.


We need to restart the country.  Think of the nation as a giant video game…it’s on the fritz and you need to hit the Reset Button and start over if you want to keep playing.

If people would rise to the occasion and join the occupy movement with the same fervor they have during the Black Friday sales we’d be talking about the glorious Second American Revolution in textbooks in ten years.  A populist revolt to bring an equal democracy to the states.

We talk about democracy like we are one; it’s not even our chosen type of governance, we’re a Republic.  We need to get rid of the plutocracy we are currently living in and replace it with a real democratic republic.

Here’s a few good ideas…

-Make lobbying illegal, no person or organization can donate more than $10 to any candidate in any election.  No more corporations buying our congressmen and presidents.

-Make it illegal to run for another office if you are currently serving in an elected capacity.  No more Senators running for President after 6 months on the job and skipping 90% of the votes in the process.  If you are a Senator and you want to become President, you have to resign as Senator before you can declare a run for office or begin campaigning.

-Congress will be in session during normal working hours.  Congress meets and discusses things at 9 am and leaves at 5 pm, I’m willing to allow them a paid hour lunch every day.  Congress will meet on Monday and Friday and they will have Tuesday through Thursday to be at their office or meet with any congressional committees they are part of.  No more of this bullshit where kids go to High School for more days than Congress is in session each year.  When Congress’ work year is shorter than your kids’ summer vacation, it’s time to get a new congress.

-Voting machines will no longer allow people to vote based on political affiliation.  As a matter of fact, the names of the candidates will be displayed, but not their political party.  If you don’t know your chosen candidate’s name and only know what party you want to vote for…you aren’t educated in the current politics enough to vote, as far as I’m concerned.

-We remove the power and authority for Congress to vote on its own pay raises.  Congressional pay raises will now be mandated by popular vote.  Over 51% of the nation’s registered voters must authorize Congress’ yearly pay rise, and the pay rise may not be more than 3% in any given year where a pay rise was issued the year prior.

 Of course an even better idea would be…disband the House of Representatives.  Each state gets two votes in the Senate, that’s enough.  We don’t give Texas or California bigger stars on the flag because they have more people, why should we give them more votes in Congress?

After we disband the House of Representatives, we can rewrite the constitution with modern-day language so that we don’t have to worry about goofy wording anymore.

Does the second amendment mean you can own any gun you can imagine?  Well we’ll right it how we want it in the Federated States of America.  Is abortion legal?  Is burning the flag against the law?  Is yelling ‘fire’ in a crowded movie theater arrest-worthy?  Can the military arrest civilians and hold them in a military tribunal instead of civil courts?

Entirely up to us: The people, the democratic voters of the new government.

All we need to do is get rid of the old bastards that the corporations put in place and create a newer, fairer, governmental organization.  Look at how much we’d save if we did it…


That spreadsheet says it all, actually it doesn’t.  That’s not including a lot of things that the House costs us, that’s just base salary and their upkeep allotment to rent office space, hire a staff of around 22 people (none of them can be paid more than about $160,000 per person), postage, and travel fees.  So just salary and tax-funded expenses equals over 600 million dollars.

The Super Committe was supposed to come with $1.2 trillion in cuts and they couldn’t do it.  I’ve got an idea on how to come up with a decent-sized chunk of it!