Drumpf’s Muslim Ban

I feel I couldn’t really remain silent on the subject of His Excellency King Drumpf’s recent executive order barring Muslims from entering the country, including U.S. Citizens originally born in predominantly Muslim countries, I saw this tweet:


It got me thinking about a man I knew once upon a while ago, Victor (real name Dharkur). He was Iraqi by birth, but when we invaded Iraq he defected to the U.S. And joined the U.S. Army as a translator and interpreter. He had taken a furlough of sorts into the Reserves to pursue his Engineering degree and he had gotten a job at the place I was working at the time.

He and I had several interesting conversations about Islam and it is thanks, in part, to him that when I wrote The Sultana’s Journey as part of my book Escort that I knew enough to make sense of how going on Hajj worked.

I never once felt unsafe with this man around, and considering we were in a law-enforcement type of setting I felt buoyed with him acting as my backup. As the senior officer I knew I could send him to do a task and he would accomplish it and that if I needed aid with something, Victor would be there for me.

We only worked for a few weeks together before a more permanent position became available for him at another location.

He had once lived in the south where he was engaged to a nice young white girl. Her family was Southern Baptist and at a gathering her father, uncles, and two brothers cordoned him off to the side and told him he had five minutes to leave or they were going to shoot him. His fiancée said, “No, they’re serious. I love you…so you should leave.”

As he was driving away he looked back to see the uncles coming out of the house carrying shotguns. That was how America thanked him for aiding us in battle. Keep in mind that neither of the five men about to shoot him had seen a day in the military and this was a career soldier they were about to murder. True patriotism there, I must say.

Now to be fair I only know a few dozen Muslims, but I’ve yet to meet one that made me feel unsafe. I, however, am intimately acquainted (and often times related) to violent Christians. People who regularly say things like, “We should just nuke the whole Middle East.”


Yes, because nothing proves you’re more peaceful than something like talking about murdering millions of innocent people because they pray the same god as you, but call him by a different name.

I feel much safer in a group with the Muslim acquaintances I have than the Christians I know. So if we really want to ban a hateful religion, Islam isn’t the one I’m afraid of.


Twitter Fun

Twitter is a banal waste of time…but it can, at times, be amusing.  This hashtag, #AddaWordRuinaMovie, or for non-hashtagian references: Add a Word, Ruin a Movie (or at least, ruin the movie’s title).  If you follow me on Twitter, you know that I got a little carried with this one.  And if you don’t follow me on Twitterwhy not?

Here are the ones that first got me interested in the joke:

West Side Story

West Side Story

There Will Be Blood

There Will Be Blood

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Jaws IV (4), which I pray is not a real movie.

Jaws IV (4), which I pray is not a real movie.

And a couple of other good ones I saw…

Up, which was a far more depressing movie than his sounds like.

Up, which was a far more depressing movie than his sounds like.

The French Connection; either that or he put 'Connection' on the end of a mustache-fetish porn.

The French Connection; either that or he put ‘Connection’ on the end of a mustache-fetish porn.

Unfortunately I've heard rumors that this is a real thing.

Unfortunately I’ve heard rumors that this is a real thing.

So, seeing all of them…I got into it and put a few of my own up, which put me up over 500 tweets, by the way.  Here are my additions to the trend (if you want to see these ones and more in their full form, you can check out my twitter profile, and maybe even follow me):


My fiancé came up with this one, a play on the musical Grease.  It would definitely make the car scenes more interesting, since the monkeys probably wouldn’t know how to work on them…just start beating these classic muscle cars with wrenches.  Kind of like what I do when my vehicle breaks down, now that I think about it.

Word2With a 4.4 out of 10 rating, I should probably be ashamed that this was one of my first ideas.  Also one of my worst, I think…a play on a drunken bender.

Word3I added Chocolate before the biopic Milk.  Or maybe I added Milk after the kung-fu flick Chocolate?  You decide.


Look!  I’ve made a horror movie slightly more racist!

Word5I think some meth might have made this movie bearable.

Word6Turns the Tolkien classic into a bondage porn flick.

Word7I seem to enjoy doing this with horror movies.

Leave a comment with some ideas of your own, if you’d like.


Shorty Shorts #6

I was skimming the news the other day and saw this from Jimmy Kimmel’s late night show. If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time you know that I’m a fan of the Silver Fox, Anderson Cooper; so you know that I enjoyed his bit for this segment.  I’ve never been a big fan of Jimmy Kimmel, personally finding the man-show more grotesque than funny and finding very little of his stand-up stuff funny on top of that, but I have to say that some of his little pranks and segments are good.  Not good enough to watch the whole show when there’s more talented late nighters out there like Jay Leno and Conan O’Brien, but I’d rather watch Kimmel than that Fallon doof (I did like Kimmel on Ben Stein’s old game show, though, I’ll admit that).

Anywho, here’s the segment from Kimmel’s show: